Are you familiar with Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO? I hate the song, but I love the part where it goes: "Every day, I'm shufflin.'" I will listen to the song when it comes on the radio just for that line. Lately, however, my life feels more like the words should be: "Every day, I'm strugglin.'"
It's hardest when I know I've done all I can do, and I am awaiting a response from someone or something before I can keep trying to remedy the situation. When the problem is out of my hands, all I can change is my attitude. I think I did a phenomenal job of keeping a cheery, positive attitude through all the gatherings with family and close friends that happened between Thursday and Saturday, but now that it's just me (and Scott) in the apartment, it's harder to keep my chin up.
It is Thanksgiving weekend. While I think the faux positivity is what attributed to such a steep decline in my mental thinking this weekend, I am going to force myself to look at the positives around me, and be thankful.
1. I have a wonderful husband who has stuck by me through the weird decisions and moods I've made over the last month(s), who attempts to do anything and everything to cheer me up (including doing the dishes as I type this).
2. I have a great family - both blood and in-laws - who support me in the decisions I've made (even if they don't understand them, or agree with them).
3. We certainly are beyond blessed with "stuff". We have money in our account to tide us over while I look for the right job. We have ample food in our kitchen. Our closets are full, we have a multitude of electronics and we have no end of books in sight. I usually start my Christmas list around now, but I'm quickly realizing we want for nothing. And it is a wonderful position to be in, and one that so many people don't have (and the best part? We did it all on a budget!).
4. We are now living in a city which I love. It is close to family, friends, and amenities, including a major airport with regularly scheduled flights at not insane fares.
5. We have friends galore in this city, with a wide range of interests and activities, so we have no excuse for staying in on a Saturday night. We still will, but it's now a choice we get to make.
6. For the most part, those around us are in good health.
I'm not going to say the items on this list are all I have to be thankful for, nor do they suggest the problems I have are inconsequential. But it is nice to know what while I may feel like I'm struggling, it's only in a couple areas, and that I am beyond successful in others.